Tonight’s podcast with our guest, Parul Shah, will delve into the topic of Bullying and PTSD. Every day in this world a bully affects the physical and mental wellbeing of all age groups- this is not just a “child thing”, it is a human thing.
As a child and young teenager, I was the victim of several neighborhood bullies. Most of them ran in packs of two or more, as that was the source of their power. When the bullies entered the playground area, I ran as fast as I could to try and get away – to no avail. The bullies were always stronger and faster than me. I did the best that I could to fend off punches to minimize the physical “damage”. However, these experiences were much deeper than the wounds I sustained.
Growing up, I always felt different and more sensitive to the energy of the world around me but could not articulate this to anyone. I now know and accept that I am an empath who is affected by both the positive and negative energies of the Universe in which we live. I was painfully shy and introverted all the way through my college years. The bully is also unique in that he or she can pick up on this sensitivity and view it as a sign of weakness (or easy target for lack of a better description). Some are physical bullies, and others exert their power using fear tactics. Let me explain what I mean.
As a teenager, us neighborhood kids came face-to-face with a family of five brothers and sisters who were either bonafide psychopaths or sociopaths – I kid you not. I remember playing a game of strikeout when said family of five arrived on the scene carrying machetes. As soon as we saw them in the distance, the freeze response kicked in and we all cowered in fear. I immediately became short of breath and could not speak or move. The oldest boy started chopping our pop cans in half with the machete. He then took out a Bic lighter, and started to ever so slightly burn off the ends of my cousin’s hair. These kids never resorted to all out physical violence- just terrorism. And it worked like a charm.
As the years passed, I took up martial arts to not only defend myself, but also to “toughen up” my exterior. Up until a year ago, I was always in flight or fight no matter what the situation. I viewed any exertion of power as the bully coming to get me again. I just did not have a clear picture of the emotional turmoil that these childhood foes created. I have discussed my healing journey at length in this forum, so I am only going to share a recent wonderful experience that happened the other day.
As you all know, I am a reiki master practitioner and have a daily practice of self-healing. I found a guided meditation for practitioners that included distance healing. Reiki energy spans the Universe, and one does not have to be in the same room as me to receive its gifts. I have sent reiki to others in Canada- it works, and it is real. During this meditation, I visualized myself as a 13-year-old boy face-to-face with the usual neighborhood nemesis’s. I was in a gangway being beaten by pack of two. I sent this 13-year-old healing reiki energy that came back around to strengthen my resolve in present day. However, I did much more than that during this distant session.
Not only did I send my younger self reiki, I also sent it to the bullies of the past and present day. It was in that moment where I realized that those individuals also needed to heal from their wounds. I firmly believe that bullying is a learned trait from the product of the environment in which one was raised. By sending them distant reiki love and light, I was also forgiving them for what they had done.
Earlier today, I was conversing back and forth with Parul who shared these words of wisdom that I leave you to ponder: “I believe in the openness of forgiveness and healing- that’s how we grow.”
In health and wellness,